Welcome to our June feature of In The Manager's Chair, a monthly magazine where we share management tips from experienced leaders and leadership coaches 🌟

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In focus this month- Self Care as a manager. 🪴 How to take care of your mental health and wellbeing whilst overseeing your team and their performance.⁠ This oversight is primarily because managers are expected to be pillars of strength, prioritising their team's performance over their well-being.

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Manager's mental health gets overlooked too often, and we have collected tips and insights from experienced managers on how they handle the pressure and stress, so that you can manage it better yourself with their advice! 💛⁠ 

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We spoke to 3 experienced leaders and leadership coaches to give advice to new and starting managers on how to keep a healthy work-life balance and how to best navigate stressful situations. 

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📣 Featured this month: Kate Waterfall Hill, Amber Skinner-Jozefson, MBA & Florence Okin. 

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Q: How do you manage stress in high-pressure work situations?

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Kate: Take a breath (or preferably several) using breathing techniques, like box breathing (slow inhale for 4, hold for 4, breathe out for 6, hold for 4) or two sharp intakes through the nose and one long breath out through the mouth. Works wonders to reset the vagus nerve, calm the heart and clear the head.

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Amber: You cannot get good at managing stress without experiencing stress. These are "muscles" that one must train. If you are leading a team, the most important thing is to continue to lead your team. This means that you need to find ways that work for YOU to remain a leader - this might take the form of meditation, mindfulness, breathing work, scream therapy (not at the office), exercise, or other. 

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Whether a stressful period lasts an hour or a season, it is crucial to purposefully explore techniques for managing and lessening this stress in order to remain an effective manager when you're needed most. 

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In my case, I assemble my personal and professional "advisory committee" (which is, in essence, friends and colleagues to whom I can go to for honest advice, feedback and support). I also make sure to exercise. One thing that has worked for me from back when I was a child athlete is to visualise, acknowledge and then be at peace with whatever I feel the worst case scenario could be. The reality is inevitably not as bad as the worst case scenario I constructed. 

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Florence: Stress is an inevitable part of any job and isn't always a negative. In some cases it can be the catalyst you need to ask yourself some important questions, as challenges are what make us great. Some things I try to ask myself: 

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* What message is this stress trying to give me? 

* What specifically is causing me stress and what emotion am I feeling? 

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Often we say stress as a blanket term but getting granular about the exact emotion will help objectify it, perhaps it's a fear of failure or rejection that's causing you to feel stress. Often stress is a sign we're ready to go up a level in life, so by shifting our mindset and asking ourselves the right questions we can often mitigate the power it holds. 

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Practically speaking, in the moment here are 4 techniques I use:

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1. Breathing- a simple in for 4 out for 8 helps me resettle my mind and slow my thoughts 

2. Write it out- writing everything I need to do in one big list and then looking at what are the priorities and action steps I can take in that moment

3. Call a friend- getting it out of your head and off your chest really helps me. It helps alleviate the burden, gain more perspective and feel less isolated

4. Get in the nature- just a quick walk will help restore some mental energy

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Q: Can you share any techniques or practices you use to stay resilient in the face of adversity or setbacks?

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Kate: Keep your good friends and allies close. Seek their counsel when times are tough. Know yourself well by doing self-reflection exercises and reviewing your core values. Celebrate the successes and learn from the mistakes. 

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Amber: "This too shall pass". Just as you cannot hone stress management without experiencing periods of stress, you cannot test your mettle without experiencing losses and set backs. This is part of life. Simply recognising that is a big part of remaining resilient. 

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I am a big believer in the power of thought. If you're unable to shake a feeling of self-doubt or sorrow about a particular professional setback, try doing something cliché like a gratitude journal. 

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I suggest to young professionals that they maintain a "Win" folder where they keep all of the positive feedback, compliments, and evidence of a success or job well done that they can refer to when the inevitable setback arrives.

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Florence: I think it’s very hard when you’re going through a challenge or setback for you to not feel the negative emotions that come up as a result. I also think it’s not productive to ignore them and apply a ‘positive mentality’ to everything. Sometimes just taking the time to acknowledge that what you’re going through is really hard, having compassion and patience with yourself that you may not have all the answers is all you can do in the moment. When you feel ready there are a few practices that can help you move forward in a meaningful and positive way

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Take the time to reflect- despite the challenge what did you learn about yourself that you didn’t know already? What new skills or awareness are you walking away with?

Practising gratitude- many times when going through adversity we forget to focus on what positive things we have in our life already. Taking time to acknowledge this, even 5 mins a day helps shift your perspective out of a victim mentality and help build your resilience. 

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Q: How do you prioritise your mental and physical well-being amidst your managerial duties?

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Kate: I walk my dog first thing in the morning every day. I drink lots of water. I do breathing exercises all the time. I have close relationships with my friends and family.

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Amber: I didn't get a handle on this until I became a parent and there was an undisputed higher priority in my life. The early years of management are all about figuring out what kind of manager you are and what works best for you. I used to feel the best when I was putting in long hours to make my team successful. In the blink of an eye, that changed. I still find tremendous satisfaction in guiding my team to success. But I know without a doubt now that prioritising my mental and physical well-being is the only way to do that. 

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I must find time to exercise and move my body. Sometimes this happens for an hour in the middle of the day. I also must rest my brain and my eyes. Sometimes this happens in the work week and I take a day off. 

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Florence: Identify what is important: Nothing is worth sacrificing your health for. Take the time to decide what are the ‘non negotiables’ in your life. It could be collecting your children from school, not checking emails in the evenings or ensuring you meditate/workout everyday. Understanding and sticking to these, helps you create positive habits and stops you feeling resentful and out of control.

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Block it out: It takes commitment and discipline to not only carve out time for your physical and mental health but to stick to it. Scheduling time each day and blocking it out in your calendar can help hold you accountable and ensure you build it into your routine. 

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Make it part of your culture: As a manager encourage your team to schedule time for this and create a culture where it feels safe and welcome. Many times your employees are mirroring the behaviours of their leaders so if they see you doing it, they will feel empowered and safe to do it themselves. 

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Hot take-outs

• When things feel overwhelming at work, take time for yourself: go for a walk or exercise to get your mind off work for a bit
• Know the people you can go to for help and guidance, have a mental list of friends and colleagues who you can talk to when things get hard
• Keep a ‘win’ folder of all the positive things you’ve accomplished and compliments you have gotten so you can read it when you’re feeling down
• Visualise situations beforehand so that you have a scenario in your head for the ‘worst case’ and you feel prepared for what’s to come
• Call a friend- getting it out of your head and off your chest really helps me. It helps alleviate the burden, gain more perspective and feel less isolated
• Take the time to reflect- despite the challenge what did you learn about yourself that you didn’t know already? What new skills or awareness are you walking away with?

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By actively managing their mental health, managers can ensure they remain effective leaders, capable of guiding their teams through challenges while maintaining their own well-being. This proactive approach not only enhances personal resilience but also sets a positive example for their teams, promoting a healthier, more supportive work environment.

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